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RIP: I Never Knew Her But I Can Just Imagine

Posted on January 27, 2008February 8, 2008 by Jolene

Update at 12pm: read that the bus driver of the DOUBLE DECKER KONSORTIUM BUS was speeding during the downpour AND smsing at the same time. WHAT THE FUCK!!!

Updated at 5.30pm: Okay, I got the greenlight from Chung Lern. Nian Ning, you were popular, loved and admired by all. I tried to make up for the times that I will never get to ever know you by reading all those blogs with messages to you. You must’ve been one amazing girl for all the love that you’re getting from everywhere. Rest in peace.

I saw Esther’s nickname on MSN today with a message to someone to rest in peace. The name could only belong to one person and it’s mean of me to wish it wasn’t her. But it was.

Most of you would probably know by now, especially if you read the papers, but to ever hear about someone so close to someone you’re so close to passing away is absolutely devastating.

We’ve actually only ever said Hi once, and that was at Sunway Pyramid’s car park. So we were only mere acquaintances. This girl is the girlfriend of one of my closer friends from school. He absolutely adores the girl and most of our conversations in recent years usually involved her and how he was very happy with her.

I hope you don’t mind me blogging this and I will remove it if you want me to, but I’m deeply affected by it and I want you to know that I will be here for you.

I couldn’t stop falling apart with tears just thinking about how he’s probably feeling now. If I’m not mistaken, she was making a trip down to KL from her hometown in Penang via a bus.

Yes, it’s another bus crash. This part shook me up a whole lot more.

The accident happened at about 5.55pm at Slim River, the North-South Highway. The very same highway that I was driving on, at the same time, from Sungai Petani. In the papers it was mentioned that the bus driver had like multiple outstanding summonses against him and yet he was allowed to continue driving the bus up and down the highway.

But I was shaking more realizing that it could’ve been any of us who rely solely on the bus to come back. There will be some weekends where I would need to come home and would be too lazy to drive. I mean I took the bus like every other weekend for two and a half years now. Till it actually happens, I cannot for the life of me imagine how a fucking bus can actually crash. It’s so huge! Cars are widely spaced on the highway, the roads are wide enough… what idiot can’t drive decently with such conditions?!

To be able to sit here, sobbing for her, typing this, realizing that it could’ve easily been me, could’ve been me who would have to be cried for by loved ones…it’s one thing to be in shock and be upset about a friend losing a loved one, but it’s another thing to know what lies in store for you just for the sake of having to come home. It’s also seriously freaking me out that we were on the same highway at the same time. The news report mentioned a heavy downpour. It was bad, I couldn’t see the cars in front of me. It was rather unfortunate for the bus though as a little further ahead would be clear skies. That’s how it is with the stupid North South Highway, clear skies alternating with torrential downpours.

Personally, I stopped taking buses from this particular bus company and avoid it like a plaque because it takes 8 hours to get me home. 8 freaking hours. Stops at Ipoh for an hour every now and then to refuel/fix the bus.

Is the government going to do ANYTHING at all? If plane tickers were cheaper, more people would be able to utilize it. We don’t need the millions of ringgit for stupid sculptures. USE IT TO PAY YOUR FUCKING AIRPORT TAXES AND LET THE POOR PEOPLE AND STUDENTS GET ON PLANES TOO! RM30 for a plane ticket isn’t too much to ask!!

If that doesn’t work, then WHAT can there be done to stop this murderers who fetch your loved ones up and down the whole of Malaysia? IT COULD’VE BEEN ME, MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT, IT COULD’VE BEEN ME. Can YOU FUCKING HEAR ME?!! A girl my age had to die BECAUSE YOU WERE LOUSY. You were lousy in maintaining the standard of your transportations. DO SOMETHING. DO SOMETHING WE CAN FREAKING SEE!!!

SHUT DOWN THIS BUS COMPANY!! Scare the other bus companies!!

SHUT DOWN THE FUCKING BUS COMPANY FOR THEIR FAILURE IN HIRING INCOMPETENT DRIVERS!! Or does the government want to wait until one of their loved ones die from a bus crash? Try it, it hits home harder when it happens to someone around you.

I cry for my friend too who is probably in a state that I dare not even imagine him to be. I wouldn’t know what to do if I were him. I really want him to promise us that he will take care of himself.

Three deaths in a week. Heath Ledger, my classmate’s childhood friend who died from Leukemia and now her.

Though I don’t know her very well but I’ve heard so many nice things about her. I know it’s what people usually say in such circumstances but almost all my friends who have met her have given her the thumbs-up. My friend is such a nice, sweet and decent boy and to have something like that happening to him, it makes you wonder why. It makes you really wonder why. Why him? Why her? Why so early? Why so sudden?

Sudden. That’s the word. Cancers, I’ve had my fair share. But car accidents? This is a first and hopefully the last.

Suicide cases would be as shocking but you would not feel that it’s such a waste because it was ultimately the person’s choice. However, to be involved in a car accident is probably the worst way to go because you didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye. The people around you will probably never quite recover from losing you.

Deaths are always so painful to digest.

In a long stretch of time, someone you know will pass away.

There are still so many people around you today.

One by one they will go.

Seems like such a long life ahead.

p/s: rest in peace, friend-in-law. Please do not mention her name if you know who she is as I’m not sure if my friend would be happy about me blogging this. But I’m just too saddened.

24 thoughts on “RIP: I Never Knew Her But I Can Just Imagine”

  1. Andylkl says:
    January 27, 2008 at 4:53 am

    I’m really really sorry to hear that. My condolences to her family and friends.

    jo: mine too. mine too. haih.
    –

  2. Valz says:
    January 27, 2008 at 6:10 am

    Condolences to her family and friends and loved ones.

    jo: 🙂 i hope it’ll be conveyed to them somehow or other. 
    –

  3. sweat says:
    January 27, 2008 at 7:16 am

    sigh so sad T_______T

    jo: somemore someone our age, our circle punya. 🙁
    –

  4. pelf says:
    January 27, 2008 at 10:06 am

    I wrote a letter to the Editor of one of the local English dailies about the previous bus crash, but it wasn’t published. Perhaps we could do something similar, you know, (like Peter Tan) write a letter to the Editor, and get it signed by as many bloggers as possible — something like a petition?

    That may not get the Government immediately work on the buses (because they’re all busy with the elections), but it scares me to think that more than a thousand additional buses have been issued permits to be on the roads during the CNY holidays.

    Email me if you wish, Jo, we’ll talk 😀

    jo: sigh pelf, i really want to help, but i don’t know how to go about this. the most i can do is wait for chung lern and her family’s further wishes. a petition would be great to show the government how scared we are for our lives. 
    –

  5. zzzyun says:
    January 27, 2008 at 10:25 am

    i was totally shocked when i heard the news. she was my college friend back in penang. we weren’t very close but i do rmb her as someone who was friendly and nice…

    it seriously scares me too… coz it could happen to anyone of us. my frenz, my family, myself…

    and you’re right.. vehicle accidents is the worse way to go…

    there is no chance to say goodbye at all…

    why must it be her? why…

    jo: seems like she went to alot of colleges… penang…singapore…sunway…wow. amazing girl.

    yup.. i think it’s worse to lose someone than actually dying..
    –

  6. PinkSmurfSher says:
    January 27, 2008 at 11:51 am

    omg. aih. so shocked to hear that. i cant believe what his going thru right now. aih. ive never met her but god he talks about her so much…aih. this is too fkin sad. my condolences. :'(

    jo: yeah, as friends of Chung Lern, you can’t help but worry about him so much. yeahlor, same here, he talks about her so much. always saying such nice things about her. She made him so happy. I could still remember going, “Hah?! Penang girl? Wah lau..then you might have difficulties meeting up!”
    –

  7. jean` says:
    January 27, 2008 at 12:58 pm

    pelf: yes, perhaps we should get something going.

    Jo: yeah it could’ve been us. and it really scares me especially when I go home every few weeks via bus! pls pass on my condolences to him. I do hope he will be strong.

    I have never trusted Konsortium – don’t ask me why. Perhaps its because they used to drive old buses. Perhaps its because I have seen the drivers and they dont look professional.

    jo: 🙁 us poor souls. haih… but u should stick with those bigger names. those that are most costly.   
    –

  8. lilian says:
    January 27, 2008 at 4:08 pm

    I haven’t read the papers yet so this comes as a quite a shock and a lot of sadness. Then, anger sets, as usual. Because they move little bit after the last few accidents, and now, they are back to their tidak-apa attitude again. All hot airs from the Min. of Transport and nothing is ever done to improve.

    RIP to your friend’s friend and tough times ahead for her family and loved ones. May they find strength.

    jo: i hate them for putting us in this position whereby we live in constant fear of wondering who’s next. we shouldn’t have to feel this way. 
    –

  9. Tyler says:
    January 27, 2008 at 4:10 pm

    It’s so strange. It only takes such tragic incidents to truly appreciate those around us, even though it was only a passing hi. Now we’ll never know. Such is life.

    jo: it was a passing hi for us. 🙁
    –

  10. cheekiang says:
    January 27, 2008 at 4:12 pm

    My condolences to him, their friends and family. I hope everyone is coping well in times like these.

    I can understand where you going dear. We entrust our lives by paying RM30 +/- to this stranger for a journey around the country – because we have no choice.

    Economically, I won’t see prices of flights coming down to RM30 for a KL-Penang trip. But I do agree with you that the Government is not doing enough.

    I will join hand-in-hand with you if you wish to start an initiative of some sort. =)

    Be Strong My Friend. Be Strong.

    jo: =( he seems quite strong in the smses. still can say how grateful he is etc etc…

    🙁 no more bus rides for us. 🙁

    –

  11. Sush says:
    January 27, 2008 at 6:12 pm

    just read the article on the staronline. http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/1/27/nation/20144004&sec=nation

    shit.

    jo: :\
    –

  12. Tan Yee Wei says:
    January 27, 2008 at 6:43 pm

    I only realised who it was this afternoon when my brother sent me a message about the passing of our friend’s gf.

    Then the full impact of your post hit me.

    jo: 🙁 saw your emaiil. think u got some pretty good points there.
    –

  13. viva girl says:
    January 27, 2008 at 8:26 pm

    hope they will rest in peace~
    i was in the bus n i saw n felt all this thing happend!
    i was sat at the top middle there~the bus is speeding~dat time when accident was rainning so so heavily .The exit door jus up of the middle there so we can go out faster~i jus get hurt ,but the impact was too strong!
    it is a horrible experience~n it was my 1st time on the double storey bus!
    i really sad when i standing at there n cant take it!
    i jus keep thinking im so so lucky~
    rest in peace for the ppl who were unfortunately past away~

    jo: I’m amazed you actually commented…. i’m talking to you on msn now..
    –

  14. entwined says:
    January 27, 2008 at 10:14 pm

    my condolences to her friends and family :(((

    jo: indeed. 🙁
    –

  15. jlshyang says:
    January 27, 2008 at 10:40 pm

    Thanks for voicing out against our incompetant government and their poor enforcements. I have had enough with their empty promises after this event. I have lost such a great friend. I wanted to vent my frustration in an entry but i am still quite shaken by this tragic news.

    May God give nianz’s family and chung lern to pull through this.

    jo: it’s the least i can do. 🙁 so horrible that we have to take these same buses all the time. 🙁
    –

  16. Paige says:
    January 27, 2008 at 11:18 pm

    Hey, I’m very sorry to hear this. I’ve lost a friend too, she left when she was 16 and we were darn close. It’s definitely hard to let go of people you get along, talk, study, play with everyday.

    We can’t bring the person back, we would just have to miss them and look forward to each day. After that incident, I started to cherish people around me. Anything can happen, anytime, anywhere.

    But our Government isn’t really doing much and I believe we should put the blame on them. We love Malaysia, the place, the food but never the system.

    They don’t really pratice what they preach. Summonses, whenever I saw people having tickets, they just crumple the paper and pretend that those were useless flyers- that could be because they knew that they didn’t really have to pay if they wanted to.

    And not only these kinds of bus drivers get to stay on the road. Most JPJ officers get bribed and let people who really don’t know driving be on the road. It endangers our lives allowing then to roam the streets.

    And the one funny thing that happens from car accidents is that the DRIVER would be unhurt or lightly injured most of the time.

    My condolences to your friend and their family. It’s traumatic, I know. I’ve gone through it before.

    Be strong!

    jo: oh no….:( and at such a young age too. yeah exactly. government is not doing much to stop this from happening. so very evil……

    –

  17. s!mple cheryl says:
    January 27, 2008 at 11:22 pm

    I admit that I haven’t had the chance to meet her but by reading our friend’s blog, I could see how much they loved each other. When I found out about the news through a friend, I was shocked. She was so young.

    Our government has brought up the issue of doing something about these drivers a few months back and see how ‘great’ they are handling it. How many life’s do people need to be lost in accidents before the government does something!?

    Jolene, if you or any had a petition towards this problem, PLEASE let me know about it. I would be happy to sign it.

    jo: i hope there will be one. yeah he loves her so much. So painful, so heartbreaking. 🙁

    ok…. i hope to discuss with him or others.
    –

  18. Addicus Zed says:
    January 27, 2008 at 11:50 pm

    My condolences to the reffered victim in this blog. I’m pretty shocked to find out that the accident was actually caused by total human error, it is unacceptable!

    My cousin brother was on that bus, he passed away alongside with this friend of yours. I’m actually quite speechless still for the loss of my young cousin brother.

    At this state of mind, i can only wish those that passed away to rest in peace.

    jo: addicuszed, please call Chung Lern if your cousin’s family decides to take legal action against Konsortium. they have to do it together. 
    –

  19. chuisan says:
    January 28, 2008 at 7:56 am

    i duno why but i felt sad after reading this post T_______T

    sigh sigh.

    jo: i’ve been sad for so many days now.
    –

  20. syl says:
    January 28, 2008 at 11:16 am

    http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/1/28/nation/20146099&sec=nation&focus=1

    my condolence.. =(

    jo: mine too..
    –

  21. Kyels says:
    January 29, 2008 at 3:05 pm

    We have morons working as the authorities.

    My sincere and deepest condolence to her family …

  22. Addicus Zed says:
    January 29, 2008 at 10:41 pm

    I just reached home from my cousin’s funeral in KL. Who’s Chung Lern and can you send me a contact number? Get me on MSN if needed be.

    addicuszed@gmail.com

  23. michy says:
    January 30, 2008 at 12:00 am

    condolences to her family, i cant imagine how devastated they are

  24. Jennifer says:
    February 2, 2008 at 10:30 pm

    Hey Jolene..
    My deepest sympathy to u and ur friend. It’s really sad that this accident involved ur friend.

    We actually saw the bus crash on our way home from SP. It happened probably 2 minutes before our bus reached that area. It was around 5.35pm actually. It was really scary because we saw so many people still trying to get out of the bus at the time.They had to crawl through the windows coz the bus was lying on its side. And we werent sure where the bus was from, so we had to call and make sure all our friends who took the earlier busses home were alright.

    As much as we would have wanted to help, our bus driver only stopped for about a minute coz it was raining. We felt so helpless at the time. And like u said, the only thing running through our heads was “It could have been us”. Most of my batchmates felt the same way.

    And you know whats the worst part?? Like 5 minutes after we left the accident scene, our bus driver starts talking on the phone and starts smoking. Like WTF man??

    I’m really touched that u started the petition. I really hope that the Malaysian government would take action against the company.

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