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You Want Long Pants? I’ll Give You Long Pants!!

Posted on September 26, 2005 by Jolene

“…there are men who gets turned on when they dress up in babies’ nappies and
waddle around the place, knocking things over and being fed pureed carrots and behaving exactly like babies.”

EWWW. That’s an excerpt from Marian Keyes’ Further Under The Duvet, her latest biography. Shit, I’d divorce any husband of mine who engages in that type of fetish. EWWWwwwwwWww.

Imagine:
“Mommy can I have your tee-tee? Baby wants Mommy’s tee-tee. Baby wanna milk-milk. Can baby have mommy’s tee-tee? BABY WANTS MOMMY’S TEE-TEE. WAhHHhhhh!!”

Oh my god. Maybe a divorce isn’t enough. If I do come across such a man, I’d do my part for womankind by wiping him off the face of the earth with an M-16. (Pity, I would have had the chance to handle one if I didn’t have to leave national service one month early).

I would be so horrified that I’d kick such a man out to the streets(in his nappies) and
throw out all his possessions(which will be soaked with petrol) and throw a match on to the pile. I freak out at the thought of such men. Anyone remember the scene from Sex And The City when Carrie was dating this politician and he wanted her to pee on him?

I draw my line at foot fetish. My feet are suffering from a serious bout of low self esteem so it could do with some hot luvvin’. My housemate Xiong Khee pointed at my toes and laughed, “HAHAHAHA!! Why so big one? HAHAHA!!”.

🙁

Moving on to other matters..

My patience limit has been tested by that cafeteria owner through and through. Hence, I decided to do this:

 

I decided to don a hooded jacket with track pants. Lishen decided to pose with this weird girl.

See if the stupid cafeteria owner is satisfied now? Only the skin on my face and hands can be seen. That should be ‘proper’ enough for her. The plan was to pull on the hood of my jacket, zip the jacket until high high and give her a damn bitchy expression while piling her fish eyeballs stew(or whatever they were gonna serve today) on to my tray and see how she’d react.

Unfortunately, it was her off day today. 🙁 

1 thought on “You Want Long Pants? I’ll Give You Long Pants!!”

  1. Jayelle says:
    December 9, 2007 at 8:54 pm

    bren Sep 30, 05 Delete
    lol jo u look hilarious n so doeful! too bad ur effort wuz wasted la

    meldee Sep 29, 05 Delete
    hey same-jacket paaaaardnerr!!! lol wear a chador la. can only see your eyeballs, but only behind a netting. hehe only you could ahve such a weird idea *huggles you to death*

    Jayelle Sep 28, 05 Delete
    esther: ah, true. but if she poisons mine, she got to poison everyone’s right?

    shee: ahahha, kedah too hot to be stupid!

    din: =) it’s the truth. ahem. ahhaha

    adam: true true. but it’s for the masses.not individual dishes u see.

    c.ho: fuck her i don’t care. very annoying.

    yuin: i wrote a long complaint letter. will blog about it later.

    sush: lol yealor. haih..

    Sush Sep 27, 05 Delete
    hahahahahahahhaa. of all days to be off!!! i wanna be there to see her face!!!! hheehhehe. 🙂

    yuin Sep 27, 05 Delete
    lucky she was not there..the muka so ganaz until like the eyes got laser beams..

    but becareful tho..after the owner ‘ka liu’ when she serve you…

    c.ho Sep 27, 05 Delete
    on one hand.. i would LOVE to know what her reaction was… on the other hand.. i do agree with adam..

    it is probably unwise to er.. piss ppl who serve you food.. gee.. seriously don’t know what they’ll do!!!

    Adam Sep 26, 05 Delete
    Do not piss off the guy/lady who serves you food – have heard enough from friends who were waiters to know that.

    Din Sep 26, 05 Delete
    is it just me or does jolene-in- the-‘hood look good? :)))

    sHee Sep 26, 05 Delete
    hmm..trying it again tomorrow? hehe…anyways, keep it cool dear! she’s not worth the problem-ler.

    esther Sep 26, 05 Delete
    jo. becareful. she might poison your food. after all, she’s the cafeteria lady. she serves you food!!

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