Not So Little Girl In A Reverie

I’m guessing that those who didn’t attend Nuffnang’s Counterstrike Competition at the Samsung WCG would not have known that I was the girl that Nuffnang asked to join their Counterstrike team. The WCG(World Cyber Games) is hailed to be the olympics of computer games and apparently it was a honour to be there to witness the maestros in action but what do I know, I’m just a girl who likes fluffy, pink things.

After seeing me kill my own teammates during training, I’m sure they were having second thoughts but were too nice to say it to me.

I’m more of a Mario Bros kind of girl and have never even tried playing Counterstrike before! But for this competition, I downloaded Garena and Counterstrike 1.6! Played and played and got bored with the Malaysian rooms and I found myself battling it out with some Taiwanese players.

Along the way, I even told my guy friends about my participation and they were quick to give their opinions.

“Shoot the head!” said the wise Jimmy.

Kwo Kuang was so proud of me that he walked over to my house straight away when I told him I was participating in a CS competition and we played from 12am to 4am. My brother was upstairs at his own computer playing with us. My brother played a few rounds with me throughout my two weeks of preparation for the game. Kwo Kuang’s nickname was “Jolene’s Bodyguard”.

And so the big day arrived.

L-r: Nick, Myself, Yee Hou. I can hardly recognize Yee Hou here! This is the first time I’ve met Nick(and Robb too) officially and after meeting him at trainings, I’ve come to really like him. You’re a nice boy, Nicholas! *pats head*

Friends from SMK Subang Utama would probably be shock to know this, Wai Ping has just joined Nuffnang as their Marketing Assistant! So you’ll probably be seeing her around the blogosphere a lot. But I think you’re better off looking out for her english name, Pinky. Which is still a little hard on my tongue..I’ll stick with Wai Ping.
L-r: Wen Qi(who just started her music course at NUS), Tim, Nick, Yee Hou, Wai Ping and Robb.

Uhhuhuhu, why so blur!
Anyway, this is our Counterstrike team. As terrorists, our tactic was to “Stick together, team!” and as counter-terrorists, our tactic was to camp at certain spots. Yee Hou jaga-ed the bridge, I took care of the counter base (and failed miserably) while the other three rempuh masuk the tunnel with hand grenades.

I seem to know each and every girl (except for Esther..and that accountant girl who got some flowers..Michelle, I KNOW YOU:) Haven’t met you before though) personally before they went into Nuffnang to work. Wai Ping is my volleyball and Interact Club junior from high school! One of my sweetest junior who always speaks happily to me. Melissa(Chong) came with her as well and SORRY MELISSA!! I totally forgot to whip out my camera. Our conversations were far too interesting. Not that yours wasn’t, Wai Ping, hahahahaa.

Wen Qi who came back to Malaysia after one week’s worth of class to attend the Malaysian Youth Philharmonic Orchestra. Such a talented girl!

This is Robb briefing the other participants (there were more people!) about the competition.

Girls!!

Wen Qi tried to strike up a conversation with Wai Ping about Counterstrike to which Wai Ping immediately said, “OH so boring, I sleep first.”

“They say when you shoot the head the enemy will die immediately!” said Wen Qi who tried to teach Wai Ping about counterstrike.

“Okay, enough. Headache already,” Wai Ping said. So rude lah you Wai Ping. tsktsk.

The game was about to begin and the team leaders drew lots.

After a few rounds, we had our first casualty. Poor Nick lost his leg.

I was extremely impressed by the grandeur that computer games can garner!

There were many booths around the Midvalley Exhibition Center with games for us to play! I had a go at Mario Kart Wii after standing next to this guy for the longest time. I inched closer and closer, hoping that he would take the hint and pass the control to me. It’s so much harder than the Nintendo DS version which I am still very much addicted to. I played against a 6 year old boy and embarrassed myself. Not gonna go into details.

At the Samsung booth was where all the Nuffnang bloggers who entered the counterstrike competition battled it out.

Guitar Hero!! I’ve heard about the game so much, I never knew that it was actually a guitar that one would need to hold when playing the game. I didn’t take pictures of this other game but I think it’s called Super Dance Revolution or something. The gamers wore headphones with their heads really low and facing the keyboard(in deep concentration) and their hands flew across the keys as the screen showed some amazing super dance revolution skills. It’s a whole torrent of arrows going all sides and these gamers didn’t even have to look up from their keyboards!

For the first round of the Counterstrike competition, I’m proud to say that I managed at least five kills! I think we did better as Terrorists. Not too shabby as Counters too.. but this was till we went into the finals and battled and lost pitifully. Though Nuffnang allowed it, but in my opinion, they should really have limited it to bloggers only as the winning team comprised of only one blogger and the rest were the blogger’s friends.

She was damn good! I is shy. Pachau!

I stood behind each girl trying to see how they played. Come to think of it, it wouldn’t be of any use also lah as once we enter the game, not like one of the terrorist suddenly got boobs right? You won’t know who’s the girl and just shoot any enemy that you see anyway.

Even though during the finals, Yee Hou and Tim died before me and became backseat Counterstrike players (making me more kancheong and thus killing Nicholas and Robb lol), I enjoyed myself and would like to thank the Nuffnang boys for inviting me and tolerating me. Inilah akibatnya when you want to form a counterstrike team with the condition of having ONE girl on the team.

After playing Counterstrike for two weeks, I’ve learned:

…that running with a knife is faster than running with a gun.

….that I should press 5 to drop the bomb and left click to activate it. -_-

And that this the best gun to use as a counter terrorist and my favourite is the AK47 for the terrorist team.

It’s a wonder how I managed to carry on into the finals. Must be their l33t skillz.

The girls toilet very clean one.

Jayelle was blogging from her toilet bowl again on the 19th of August, 2008
Filed under: 56k killer, eat shit sleep | 8 Comments! »

While driving down the Federal Highway today, I felt a little turned off by everything on the radio. I feel uneasy when I listen to songs with noisy electric guitar backgrounds. Just like a long electric noise, not like single notes, you know what I mean? Electric strumming? Like one continous Zhhhhhhnnng. Ah shadefakup.

As I was driving, thoughts started permeating my head as it usually does when my mouth is closed for too long (when the radio is on, it opens to sing along).

It’s no surprise that I started thinking of Chee Kiang and how we’ve come to where we are. Like a silly girl, I started smiling to myself and thought, “Hey, my thoughts are quite entertaining.” And so entertained them, I did.

I hope nobody has dirty thoughts at this point.

We’ve actually been living in the same town for 13 years before he left to Singapore for his studies. Only THEN I decided, okay, I’m ready to be in a relationship with him. That’s how we are for the last 5 years. Well, technically we’ve been together for 3.5 years now.

Let’s eliminate the first 3 and 4 years of our lives as I was living in Petaling Jaya and he was up in Penang with his grandparents. We both started living in Subang Jaya in 1990.

While I was attending kindergarten in USJ2, crying when boys stepped on my feet and playing in the sandpit during recess, he was about 2km away in SS19, attending kindergarten with the likes of Nicholas Chan and Chew Sher Lyn. Perhaps we walked pass each other in Subang Parades on weekends while holding onto our parents’ hands, not knowing what we would become one day.

When he attended JMC classes at Yamaha Subang Parade from 1991-1992, I was perhaps sitting there, waiting for my mother to be done teaching a class. We probably saw each other and still, never knew what we would one day become.

Then came primary school and a total of 5 wasted years were spent not knowing each other. Both schools were separated by a single fence and we probably led very different lives. He was the haughty-totty assistant head prefect, going around carrying out orders yet afraid to lose his best friends who were particularly naughty boys (NAMELY CHEW KAY HONG..haha) and I, a goodie two-shoes prefect who carried a UPSR karangan book around to make me feel more at ease with the impending UPSR examinations. Perhaps when the children from both primary schools spilled out into their parents’ cars, we might have crossed paths, not knowing what we would one day become.

Maybe after school once, he defied his school’s communist-ish rules about not crossing over to Titian Emas and Kett Star, two extremely famous stationary shops which catered to both SRSS19 Subang Jaya and SRJK(C) Lick Hung. Perhaps he saw me choosing some stickers there while he bought an ice lolly, crossing paths again, not knowing what we would one day become.

When we finally entered the same school grounds in form1, we sort of noticed each other as how you would with most of your peers whose names you have yet to know. He knew me as that fair and skinny(ok I add myself one, but I was really all bones back then) librarian girl and I always saw a really really really tall (before everyone else had growth spurts) librarian dude with the Lee 911 hair style from the Chinese Stream. If only I knew what we would one day become.

I am however, thankful for that entire year in form2 where we knew of each other’s school-society inclinations and had more things in common to talk about (after meeting in the library while on duty early n the year). He was a die hard Leo member and I was a die hard Interactor. The on-going feud between both clubs never deterred us from being friendly to each other.

As form3 rolled around, we were both given the same projects and duties in our own clubs. We both handled the Valentine’s Project and forced each other to buy something from our respective clubs for each other. He made me buy him some candies from his club and I made him buy me a Message In A Bottle from my club. He wrote an “I love you!” on my card but I knew he was being silly back then and it really meant nothing. If only we knew what we would one day become.

We all know what happened in the middle of form3. No need for me to elaborate. For the noobs, read here.

Upon returning to form4, perhaps someone up there knows what we would become someday, we were put in the same class.

While I enjoyed him as much as I do now back in form4, I was an out right bitch to him in form5.

Over less than year, he left for Singapore to pursue his studies and I realised that I actually really do miss him.

I’ve been missing him ever since.

Which I had all those years to be around him more than what I am able to afford now.

Long distance sucks major balls.

Jayelle was blogging from her toilet bowl again on the 15th of August, 2008
Filed under: Emo, Jolene's theories | 9 Comments! »

Don’t you hate it when you’re stuck in between, trying to maintain a friendly deposition just for the sake of a reputation(even more so when money is involved) even when some people take advantage of what you HAVE DONE FOR YOURSELF FOR RM150 and then try to cash in on the sudden surge in traffic by saying more than they should have/are allowed to?

Trying to sound friendly and all but so obviously trying to make small talk by questioning the quality of certain things I have in public and make very very very subtle comparisons?

Maybe the person doesn’t mean it that way.

But I should know.

Coz I’m a girl.

Jayelle was blogging from her toilet bowl again on the 14th of August, 2008
Filed under: Bitching, Jolene's theories | 6 Comments! »

There are two types of people. People who tell their friends about their problems and people who remain so mysterious about it that they start pissing you off.

It’s nobody’s fault if they choose to keep their problems shut off from the rest of the world. There is a fine line between loving your privacy and alienating the people who generally care about you. It’s like a secret group that you’re not allowed to join. It sucks to be left out.

The degree of each person’s problem differs from the other. When a friend shares his problem with you, you give him your utmost attention and purse your lips sympathetically at the right moments, nod your heads and throw in a few mmmm-mmms just to show how much you understand him. It’s not an act actually, you’re being a very good listener and everyone loves having a good listener.

Problems could come in a variety of forms from a death in the family to breakups to trivial things between classmates/housemates. Do you judge your friends on the reactions that they give you when you confide in them? A death is a death. So you broke up, life goes on. Some of them take it as part and parcel of life and just expect you to move on as if nothing ever happened. Because they don’t feel the effect, it’s probably not that big a deal for you as well.

Sure, words of comfort might pour in when your tragedy has been made known to friends far and wide. Some friends prefer not to get involved for fear of evoking more emotions in you. Is that really the makings of a good friend? To stay away from comforting a person who needs comforting the most?

You might not know what to say to a person who is going through a difficult period and so you choose not to say anything at all. This actually hurts the person more because she feels that no one really understands. She might not look like she wants to talk about her problem but it would help a tiny bit when someone gives a concerned gesture.

What are you supposed to say to a friend who is desperately grabbing onto a fleeting life of a beloved one? Do you sugarcoat your words and say that everything will be all right in the end? Can you allow yourself to spurt cliche lines after cliche lines and knowing clearly well that there is a chance that a happy ending might not happen? Are you even doing your friend a favour by telling her things that you expect a person would want to hear?

How can you say it’s okay when you’ve never been through it yourself?

Some friends will never have the courage to sit down and watch you cry.

The moment you open your mouth to spill your heart, your eyes fill up and your voice breaks - anyone would feel this natural instinct to mother you but not everyone would dare to do it. it gets awkward when a person cries. Ever notice how guy friends fall silent when you (since I’m a girl, I’ll assume that the reader is a girl) start crying? Heck, even I become silent if a friend should start crying but of course, my shoulders are always there for any of you. I do panic though when a friend cries. It’s like trying to hold up a toppling vase in vain.

There are also people who would tell the world about their problems. Like bumble bees they would fleet from flower to flower, spilling their woes as they go. I believe I am such a person. People like me just like to talk. We crave for opinions and sometimes, admittedly, prefer that the opinions are on our side. But how many times is too many? Would friends not get sick of hearing the same issue over and over?

After watching so many episodes of Sex And the City, I realised that Carrie will always have a problem that is bugging her. When the four girls talk, no matter who is talking about another problem, she will divert the attention back to her problem. She will find a way to butt in and make the lime light shine back on her. Months later, she will still be talking about the same problem over and over again.

I, for one, am no Carrie Bradshaw.

My weakness is this mouth of mine but I believe I have learned enough lessons to talk less of problems that do not belong to me.

Unlike Carrie, I don’t think that the world revolves around me. I would not repeat my problems to my friends unless they ask or if something new crops up that seriously pisses me off.

That being said, exactly what is the limit of times one can give re-runs of their problems to their friends?

Jayelle was blogging from her toilet bowl again on the 13th of August, 2008
Filed under: Jolene's theories, Ngam ngam cham cham | 3 Comments! »