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Don’t Poke Me, Ever.

Posted on March 21, 2007February 8, 2008 by Jolene

Back in A-levels, I was waiting with a friend(I don’t know if he allows me to tell this story) for his mum to come pick us up. A classmate went up to him from behind and flicked his ears, sort of like saying Hello. Instead, my friend turned around and whacked the other guy on the side of the head until the classmate was on the floor and my friend was still hitting him.

He regained his composure and said, “Oh sorry dude..sorry, I lost myself there… just that I really hate it when my ears get flicked.”

It’s a little scary to be standing next to a fight scene, but in a way I can relate to my friend.

I know how annoying when a sensitive body part gets provoked by friends.

Coming from a bonafide ass slapper, this might sound hypocritical but let’s just scratch out the obviously offending body parts that will land you in trouble.

I just don’t get it why some friends like to stick their fingers into the sides of my waist!!

I absolutely hate it. I get extremely ticklish there and even if a finger is just centimetres away from my waist, I can feel the heat radiating with increase intensity from the fingers as it comes nearer and nearer to my waist. I ABSOLUTELY HATE IT.

Especially when I’m damn sleepy. I will scream at you, I don’t care who you are. A good friend, an acquaintance, a junior, a senior, family whatever.

But WHY WHY must someone poke another person just for fun and then giggle while looking at you? Do you expect me to fucking giggle too?

I have told many friends to stop it but they just go on and on.

I mean pretending to grab my boobs or pretending to slap my ass is fine. But I really really really really despise people jabbing the sides of my waist.

You know the chinese has this saying that goes, “Keng lou por”(scared of wife) if you’re the type who feels ticklish when someone pokes you at the side of your waist.

It’s damn annoying. It’s not funny. It’s down right childish.

I am not appreciative of such ‘humour’ even though I still treasure those relationships and friendships alot, I just cannot tolerate such stupidity.

I can’t believe the amount of times that I have to yell “stop it!!” and they still don’t know how to stop.

One day I will really slap whoever who dares to poke the sides of my waist. I will actually scream like a banshee because it’s ticklish. It’s the ear piercing Mariah Carey type of scream okay. It’s not put on, it comes naturally because I am really really traumatized by jabs at the sides of my waist. And i hate hate hate hate hate it. I think I’ve said it many times already.

I just wish I could wear a shirt that says “NEVER EVER POKE THE SIDES OF MY WAIST.” but knowing how idiotic some people can be(read: not being able to tell when I’m joking and when I’m being serious… which is difficult to do as I’m jovial most of the time) will continue poking me all the more.

ARGHHH!!

If you poke me, and you’re a friend, I’ll start to dislike you. If I’ve started to dislike you, and if you poke me, I will hate you. If I hate you, and if you poke me, I will scream at you and make your name smelly. If I’ve made your name smelly, and if you poke me, I will slap you. If I’ve slapped you before(means we’re enemies for life), if you poke me, I’d probably be dead because there’s no way in hell people who are enemies with me will dare to come within a 2metres radius from me.

HATE POKERS!!!!

15 thoughts on “Don’t Poke Me, Ever.”

  1. nic says:
    March 21, 2007 at 7:04 pm

    agreed. (the last para of your entry.)

    For me, i HATE it when people kick my chair (when im sitting of course) for no apparant reason or use my chair to manuevere themselves over. Its like they’ve just disrupted my inner peace or something.

    or when people just kick your shoes or poke your arms repeatedly and giggle at you and expect you to laugh with them (like what you had said)

    fricken childish, i wouldnt shout or hit them, but im having great difficulty refraining myself from spitting sarcastic remarks onto their faces.

    tough times.

    jo: ohmigod ya it is rude to kick chairs! have u tried people trying to step on ur shoelaces!!?? grrrrr.
    –

  2. Peggy says:
    March 21, 2007 at 7:55 pm

    Wow, you really do hate it a lot..
    I hate it when my boyfriend tickle my chin.
    It gets very irritating when I cant fight back at all.

    jo: haha that’s endearing what..
    –

  3. meldee says:
    March 21, 2007 at 8:28 pm

    i hate it when people touch my head. and don’t ever poke my forehead if you want to live another day. i will snap.

    jo: hahaha poking and slapping head is disrespectful, i’d hate it too.
    –

  4. iris says:
    March 22, 2007 at 12:17 am

    LOL
    i am extremely sensitive at the waist too!! and i will cry if i go over ticklish ;p

    jo: ahhaha i feel like dying one u know.
    –

  5. sweat says:
    March 22, 2007 at 12:47 am

    ooh i know who your friend is! I flicked his ear before but he didn’t kill me. discriminating giler.

    i’m not sensitive ANYwhere except my armpits. no fun.

    jo: lol coz that’s because he loves you. see, you spilled the beans adi. no fun.
    –

  6. Baz says:
    March 22, 2007 at 1:47 am

    HOI i didn’t beat him to the ground lah!! jior exaggerate betul.

    jo: lol!! u come and reveal your own identity! damn funny.. yes la he was on the ground………
    –

  7. Sush says:
    March 22, 2007 at 2:33 am

    hahahah. i still remember you telling us about it.

    jo: u know that day I was driving, kwo kuang wanted to tickle my sides. SOMEMORE I WAS SENDING ABBY HOME TO PUCHONG. FUcking highway dei! ask amanda and abby la, they were laughing like hyenas because i was screaming like a hyena..nearly wanted to cry di.
    –

  8. g_mas says:
    March 22, 2007 at 3:20 am

    HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA at least now i know which part of you not to.. er.. poke. my rules are pretty simple, if you’re close to me anything goes. if u’re not, hold on to your balls/genitals and run for dear life. hehehe :p

    jo: hahhaa don’t you dare ar…….. hahaha.. well you’re a nicer person than I can ever be.:)
    –

  9. suetmei says:
    March 22, 2007 at 7:53 am

    for me, it’s my hair.
    no touching and especially no pulling my hair!!
    especially back in sec school when i had my hair tied in a ponytail and some ppl will just pull my ponytail like it’s some rope wtf lol.

    jo: why some people so rude one???!:( 🙁 🙁 very pain one la. 
    –

  10. Jose says:
    March 22, 2007 at 8:56 am

    my circuit trips when itchy hand(s) pulls off my cap (especially in public). Com’on I’m already having a bad hair day, the last thing you wanna do is to expose untrimmed vibrissas growing on top of my head.

    The parallel analogy. When you’re walking on the street, how would you feel if I forcefully remove your apparels?!

    jO: ooo! *takes down notes*, i always had an inkling some guys were seriously pissed when their caps were removed. thanks for the confirmation!
    –

  11. c.ho says:
    March 22, 2007 at 9:51 am

    mmm… i think everyone has their pet peeve in some way. maybe ppl do tthese hings innocently. I poke ppl. I don’t know why. Just a friendly tease especially to close friends. I guess that if they ppl don’t know and do it for the first time.. then maybe they should be forgiven but if they do continue to persistently do as told not to.. then obviously they’re just being thick-headed numb-skulls.

    jo: ehehe.. yeah, there were alot of pokers in your year. i remember Jill and Pei Xuan being pokers.. but I still liked them alot:) just didn’t like to be poked, but you guys were still great seniors!! *suck up* hahahaha.. 
    –

  12. suelynn says:
    March 22, 2007 at 9:19 pm

    i.feel.exactly.the.way.you.do.

    it’s like.. they don’t listen or sth?!?!

    but no one does it to me anymore except for kids.. and, i don’t like kids (not bcoz of that.. i just don’t) so it makes the situation worse! have to contain myself when all i really wanna do is whack the kid. i did lose my temper once >.

    jo: itu la! ish ish..~ hahaha will u be a mum in the future?:D
    –

  13. Sharlini says:
    March 22, 2007 at 10:18 pm

    I detest people poking me in the ribs. Most times, I’ll retaliate by poking them in the ribs. Of course, I don’t jab them hard, just a gentle prod – like checking for fat. I’m stick skinny, so I can really feel that jab.

    Once, I was sitting next to this girl at the beginning of my course and she’d belasah me just because she felt sleepy. Of course, I tried to retaliate as well, but not while in front of the instructor.

    I finally managed to end the torture when I showed her the bruises I got. Yaay!

    Maybe you should make a t-shirt that says, “If you want to live another day, DON’T [insert peeve here]!” In my case, it would be: “If you want to see another sunrise, DON’T poke me in the ribs!”

    jo:
    poor thing!:( i can feel your pain. metaphorically, obviously not literally. (pokes at own fats). … how to belasah? she think she very cute ar!! … hahahha..i’ll be making a big business!!

    –

  14. Sharlini says:
    March 23, 2007 at 1:22 am

    Oops, maybe I should copyright those lines. XD

  15. teMMe says:
    March 26, 2007 at 11:07 pm

    oh gawsh I get what you mean. poking is the worst way to have fun. for me it doesn’t tickle, it actually hurts when people poke. especially those people who don’t poke but jab their finger straight in. I know lar I got damn lot of fats but hey, painful k.

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