I have a classmate named Lydia who hails from Sg. Petani. She’s abit mad.
It’s like this, she asked me to bring her to a quiet place to study for our- Lydia, can you please stop laughing? – physiology test which is like in half an hour. So I brought her to the Generic Lab where there are like a fair amount of computers in this unbelievably huge space. It’s really quiet as well and the aircon’s not that cold.
Yes, before we came it was really nice and silent.
Then she started to read the notes and would talk to herself like she’s a little child that needs to be fussed upon.
“Do YoU kNoW WhY PRoThRoMbIn Is AcTivAtEd? AcTiVaTed FaCtoR 10 BeCoMEs proThRomBin AcTiVaTor To ActiVate ….” she would go on and on. Making physiology sound like something from a storybook for pre-schoolers.
…this place has like 4 other students. So her voice is easily heard on the other side of the room. LOL. I was like putting my head in my hands because I was ALSO trying to absorb MY notes.(Lydia, reading this? Hohohohoh).
Then she would giggle and giggle at herself and hit me because I was making faces at me. Shit, she hit me again.
I look around the comp lab and said, “I’m so sorry about this,” to nobody in particular and Lydia collapses into another fit of giggles.
Lydia is one of the few people left in this world who can be vulgar and incredibly innocent at the same time.
One time one of the lecturers pissed her off and she was like, “Eurrghhh, I could stuff him up with a banana!!”
Yan Rui stared at her in shock.
“Oh, okay, maybe a cucumber,” she decides to be kinder.
A couple of months back when Yan Rui and Li Shen just got together, I was dancing in front of them singing a song about love. Then Lydia joins me and bops up and down together with me making her own lyrics along. We had a good laugh and after the new couple left, I asked her, “So you know?”
She said, “Know what?”
“They are together lah!” I said.
“Hah?? I didn’t know!” she gasped.
“You don’t know then why did you dance along to my song?” I asked her, amused.
This is also the girl who thought me my new themesong.
“If I were, a bachelor’s boy, and if I were to marry,
I would marry, a carpenter’s daughter, more than anybody!~”
Everybody say together: Whyyyyyyyy??
“Coz she can screw, and I can screw, and we can screw each other,
All night long in the middle of the night, screw one another!”
There’s more. Got vampire’s daughter la, ice-cream man’s daughter la, balloon man’s daughter la..etc.
This girl ar. LOL. I’ve met my match. We insult each other’s breast size in mandarin. It doesn’t sound so crude to us because we both don’t know how it sounds when we speak it.. so it’s entertaining in a way. LOL.
One time I was with her mum and her in her mum’s car on the way back from college, she told her mum, “Mummmm, a girl from class dyed her hair. Can I dye mine? See! Jolene also dye her hair..!”
Her mother made abit of disagreeing noises.
I butted in and say, “yalah aunty! my hair damn dry now, I damn regret!”
She hit me again. HAHAHAHA.
The mad woman is still talking to herself about physiology. It’s only a matter of time before someone stands up and screams at her, “SHUT UP!!”