The Pimptress Dwells In Other Businesses Too!

Every now and then a good blog pops out of no where. A rare gem these days. The heavy onset of eat-shit-sleep blogs is taking a toll on the blogosphere. On some days my blog is guilty of eating shitting and sleeping too.

But you know what I mean, a good read is a good read.

So, indulge!

Single and Dating in KL is a group blog by a few single KLites moaning and raving about the dating scene in KL. Not quite, but ALMOST like a KL Sex And The City. Not enough sex, but the focus is more on emotions, evaluations, judgements and well, romanticism. And a good dosage of cynicism.


I know the previous blog that belongs to the blogger that I’m about to present next. Though he remains anonymous in his new blog, but I’m very sure it’s the same guy. I recognise the style. All I can tell you is that he is a super senior in my secondary school. About 11 years my senior. Yea, I was in kindergarten when he was in form5. He writes really well .. kind of captivates you with his flow of words and you just drink up all that he has to offer. Another alluring fact about this Barry White of words is that he is single, CYNICAL and romantic.

Hop on over to Coffee, Cigarettes and Conversations.

Warning: addiction ensues.

Matters aside, I’d like to let you read this article my brother wrote. I told him ages ago that I’d put it up on my blog if it doesn’t get into my school magazine, Gemala.

And here my brother does what he does best: Emo Love Stories.

It made me tear. Really! He put it on his blog before but I can’t find the link and he doesn’t want me to link him back(I have no idea why) and he got very good comments for it. Hope you guys can spare sometime and read it and prove his editors wrong.

I say it’s Gemala’s loss anyway. My blog gets a steadier amount(ahem, larger amount too. :P) of readership than the annual year book anyway.

I once wrote a story about a girl who had drunken sex and ended up giving her daughter away for adoption and seeing disappointment in her daughter’s eyes when she was older. It got rejected because I mentioned sex.

Don’t say lah… even our senior pages were rejected because some photos promoted truancy(one foot stepping out of the school gates…..), gangsterism(kids pretending to beat each other up), academic negligence(books dumped in a dustbin) and other lame ass things. You think the Malaysian censorship board is bad? You should try my old school’s magazine editorial board.

Oops, I digressed again. Nah, read lah!

The road seems so long.

The first day I met you, I was not sure if it was just me, or if someone had really injected drugs into my veins from behind. The day at the carnival seemed so short. I caught my first glimpse of you when queuing up for a ride. For that moment, the sounds of the roller coaster seemed to fade off, and everyone around me disappeared except you.

Hello there stranger? Are you lost too?

It took me more courage than I thought I had to introduce myself. You smiled shyly, not knowing who this boy standing in front of you was, or the special place he’d take in your heart forever. I remember how your friends giggled from behind, enjoying a romantic scene. But I didn’t care what they thought, because at that moment, all I hoped was for you to acknowledge my existence.


Maybe if we walk together, we’ll find where this road leads to.

Remember our first date at the movies? Ah…I shed a tear of joy each time I do. You held on to my shoulder tightly as we watched the horror flick, too afraid to watch the ghost appear. When you found out that I had my eyes closed all through the show, you wouldn’t stop laughing all the way back as I drove you home. It was only when a little kiss was planted on your cheek in front of the door that you hushed, and your face turned bright red.


On the day we married, I was the happiest man on earth. There were probably no angels singing, or little white doves flying above the church as we walked out as man and wife. But I was happy, because seeing you smile and thinking that you were mine forever seemed too good to be true. And it was.


Braving the odds, we journeyed together hand in hand. Your shoulder was my strength, and your heart was my hope.


When we moved into our new home, you happily dragged me to every room, pointing out every detail of how you wanted it furnished. The room for the children that we would have must have its walls painted bright blue, with stars and planets drawn on it so that he or she would not be afraid of the dark during the night. The wall in our bedroom that blocked us from the rising sun to was to have a sliding glass door so that we could greet the new day together every morning. I laughed at how you thought our house could be turned into a romantic haven, and you pouted the entire day until I agreed to work on it immediately.


The road is uncertain. But as long as you are with me, my friend, I know that all will be alright.


On the day you passed away, I could not bring myself to accept the fact. I wanted to hit the young boy who drove without a license till he bled, so that he could feel the pain you felt. But as he kneeled on the floor in tears and begged for forgiveness, I could not bring myself to it. Dropping to my knees, I cried too. The memories of you filled my head, each one bringing another drop of tear to the pool beneath me. You were so young, and there was so much in life that awaited the both of us.


Why am I alone? I look back at the road, hoping to see you, as if you’ve merely tripped and was left behind, but got back on your feet and caught up with me again.


The world seemed black and lifeless. Little care had I left for anything, and only the thought of you kept me going. I visited every place in the world that reminded me of you, from where we first met at the carnival, to the city where we had our honeymoon. I cursed fate for taking you away from me, yet once again cried for it was also fate that brought us together. Was this some game that it played, bringing us with hopes to journey through life hand in hand, yet so easily breaking us apart with death?

I fall to the ground, the road’s sharp slates cutting into my skin. There is nobody to pick me up again. For you are gone. And still, the road seems so long.


As I sit on our bed one day, looking through photographs of us, our little son puts his head on my lap, and says he misses you. I hug him tightly, and told him that I felt the same. Fate has denied him the love of his mother as he grew up, so I swore to myself never to let him or you down. But whenever I waited in the car to pick him up from school, or when I sat down during his wedding, I’d imagine that you were with me by my side, wearing the smile I’ll never forget. Maybe you really were.


I get on my feet again, every inch raised from the ground powered by the memory and love I had with you. Still in my heart, you were with me. I dared the road once again.

Our son is by my side as I lie on the same bed we slept on. With him is his life’s partner, and a little story which he and her have to write, just like we did. They are crying, but I can only help but smile. It’s been so long, but I’m about to see you again.



Hey there… I believe we’ve met?


I finally close my eyes, with the image of our son and grandchild forever embedded into my soul. I can also see you standing beside them, smiling. Everything feels so light… and then here I am again, in an uncertain road. I can’t see where it leads to, but I feel someone holding my hand, saying:

Let’s see where it goes…

Mainstream Hype Indulgence

I felt like I was a giant watching little clockwork toys taking to the stage in a little musical box.


Note: Don’t ever ever ever buy RM90 seats. Call me the next time some big name musical decides to come to Malaysia and utilizes Istana Budaya instead….or even KLPAC(a little bias here as I’ve not seen it for myself, only heard rave reviews about the place).

I wouldn’t KNOW if the thing sucked. I was looking down from an angle. If I jumped off my row of seats, I would die. I was THAT high up and FAR away from the stage. I know how much my father hates bad seats because it’ll be 2 hours(movies are about 2 hours too) of his life wasted. Felt quite bad also because it was I who made heck of a lot of noise about how I am oh so very pitiful that I didn’t get to see Saturday Night Fever boohoohoo and can I PLEASE see Grease??

Thank god for Optical Zoom.

Okay lah, fun enough to make me come home to download all the Grease songs.

L-r: Aud, Jia Min, Hsin.

Someone shouted, “JOLENE LAI PEI SHAN!!!” when I was going down the escalator after the show. EH EH EH!! HSIN EE!! JIA MIN!!! AUDREY!!! AUDREY IS BACK FROM US ALREADY(I know that..but still, seeing it is believing it mah:P).

Apparently they were oggling my shoes before they looked up and realised that it was me. HAHAHAHA. Typical girls lah!!:D *hugs* So good to see them. And see how pretty they looked, all dolled up for the occasion? These girls mad one lah. Saved up for the RM200 seats AND had a good time.

Since I had my hair up with a chopstick the entire day, I had nice curls to camwhore with! That’s my brother’s toes by the way. He was playing Dota when I asked him to help me to take a picture of my hair.

Don’t know lah if I should go for straight hair or curls. Thinking of rebonding. I know, I’m like FOUR years behind time. It’s just so typical of me to wait for something to go wayyy out of fashion before jumping into it. Wait, no. No. It’s usually the case of me holding on to a certain style for SOOOO long that it comes back in fashion.

Oh yeah! I finally watched The Da Vinci Code at Central Square(the only go-able shopping mall in Sungai Petani. Which is just *slightly* better than Summit USJ.). After our class ended at 11 o’clock..we decided to catch the 11.30am show. I called up the woman and asked if there were still tickets and she aptly replied, “Ohhh..banyak lagi.”

Well, that’s Kedah for you.

Most of the movies these days are book adaptations and I was quite upset with myself that I have not finished reading the book. I made it a point to read all the books before heading to the cinemas. Here I am, catching up on some reading in the elevator.

Still reading..

GSC offers the cheapest student rates around. PLUS this GSC is located in a small town. Go check the websites if you don’t know what I’m talking about. Seems that big cities have higher ticket prices.

Only RM4!! ne ne ni bu bu.

I don’t know why the movies got such bad reviews. Chee Kiang was telling me that he fell asleep when they spoke french. He watched it with his scholarly friends(Kai Lin, Charming Chun Leen, FuiChin(did u go?) and Britt.. not sure who were the rest.:)) when they went to Singapore for their university interviews. Obviously lah, no Malay subtitles to explain to you ma. There weren’t even english subtitles for the French part. Kakaka..go Singapore and see somemore lah:D

But I liked it!! I went with Lie Yuen, Narjit, Ah Thong and Steven. Since I only read till the part where Teabing brings them into London with his private jet(i’m a slow reader, you got a problem? *turns tables over HK-gangster style*..Andy see how you influenced me.. haha)… so up till that part, Narjit, Lie Yuen and I were squealing about how they missed out some parts and how it’s not like that and what was actually said instead. After that part, Narjit and Lie Yuen whispered to each other excitedly and leaving me to go, “Whatwhatwhat??” only to be replied with annoyed “YOU SEE LAAA!!!”s from the both of them.

I guess it’s fun to have read HALF the book and then watch the movie. Something different right. Like having dessert half way through dinner. And then continuing with dinner after that. Different parts of your taste buds have been stimulated. Gives a whole new perspective.



Life is so much better now that I have installed an aircon in my room in Kedah. Gone are the days where I would slide all over the floor crying about how hot it is and feel the oil ooze out from my pores.

Mr. Aircon Man installing an aircon. He made such a mess with the drillings and stuff.. everything in my room was covered in brick and cement powder.:( A good excuse for spring cleaning..spent nearly 4 hours sweeping, mopping and wiping everything that has a surface.

Strange thing though, the next morning, during class, I received an sms.

“Hi…I am the airconman yesterday. Everthing find?”


This must be some new form of customer service.
I replied, “Yea, it’s fine. Thank you very much.”

“Have a nice day ^^ ” came the reply. Got emoticon somemore.

“Hehe. Thanks. You too.” I was still playing the grateful customer.

“So you study here?” he queried.


Okay. Definitely not part of his company’s customer service policy already.

When Chee Kiang called, I told him, “Hehe! I installed my aircon yesterday and the aircon man smsing me today. Aircon man hitting on me leh!”

“Don’t perasan kay!” he said.

“Cannot perasan abit issit now! Cis! Let me perasan for awhile ma. Hahaha.”

Cheap thrills.

But since the aircon man spoke in passable english(which is a pleasant surprise), I now even know about his grand hopes for the future.

“ur right .. kedah damn sien. i wan go back to penang next yr. become sub contractor there instead.”

“Icic..good luck to you then”

By the way, it’s not the guy in the photo. It’s another one who was doing the outside unit. The one in the photo reminded me of some kungfu guy what with the big oversized V shaped t-shirt and big puffy track pants.

I just find it damn amusing that I was smsing my aircon man. But after awhile I got bored and stopped replying and took a nap in my newly air conditioned room instead.

Have You Ever Gone Trigger Happy in A Pasar Malam?

This entry is a little overdue..just like my pimptress entries(PATIENCE LAH). But hope you guys enjoy the photos anyway. Yep, 56 killer is here to kill your modem again.

One thing bad about buying a fridge with no dual component would be having a whole winter wonderland experience whenever you take the chicken out to defrost. It’s so bad that we can’t even close the door to the freezer compartment due to the accumulated frost. We decided to manually remove all the frost. Hard work you know!

So much of snow!! Yeah, the hat is my hairband. I’m so used to it that I didn’t even realise that I wore it out of the house to throw rubbish once. I asked Lie Yuen, “Why are people looking at me weirdly?” She said, “I also don’t know leh..”

This is how accustomed we have become to my pimptress hat. Hehe.


*scrape scrape* And I didn’t ask Lie Yuen to take a photo at THIS angle. i look like an aunty with saggy boobs. ANGLE SAJA OKAY….ANGLE.

Josiah has been talking about this pasar malam about 15 minutes away from where we stay. He asked us if we were interested to check it out and have dinner there on Tuesday. Of course I would readily say yes to any photo taking opportunity.

Little Boss relaxing while manning his mum’s rattan stall.


*shivers at childhood memories* just kidding lah. Only once or twice my grandmother would say it to us. My dad’s form of punishment is kneeling down in front of the altar/take rubber bands and flick it at us/leave me downstairs with the lights off/threatened to only feed me roti canai with sugar and nothing else(i ended up loving roti canai and sugar more than any other mamak food).

Ughh..but people still eat it.

The aroma of joss sticks and incense is somewhat nostalgic to the average Chinese, don’t you think?

Veges are always pretty to photograph!

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE….We’ve been in love for… 16 years now. My grandmother put some durians on a plate for me and put some newspapers on the floor of the dining room for me to sit on. While the adults enjoyed a durian feast at the dining table, 3 year old Jolene dug her fingers curiously into the soft fleshy durian with utmost fascination. She stuck her thumb into her mouth and the rest as they say is history.

Rempah ratus… herbs.

BRA..LELONG LELONG. I know it’s about the same price as those that they sell in Carrefour..but ew.. Can never bring myself to buy undergarments from pasar malam.

Petai.. quite interesting the way they present their ware.

Cosmetics. Never ever buy foundation, lipstick, eyeliner or lipliner from capalang brands. Eyeshadows are fine because mixing and matching is good. And you can throw the colour out after using it once or twice as it is so cheap. But ugh, imagine putting some RM3.90 lipstick on and then swallowing it as you do with your usual lipstick.


Yes, I KNOW it’s a watermelon.

L-r: Josiah, Lie Yuen
We bought some satay for dinner.

*air liur meleleh*

This durian dude asked me to take a photo of him. I layaned lah. And then the mango dude in the next stall told me to go home and “use the computer to see through his pants, because he never wear underwear”. Sheesh.

Meat… been a while since I had some good ol’ pork. It’s not pork though.

Dried goods.

Nice colours!!

MMMMmmmMMm…. but no time to cook la these few days. So just for the sake of taking photographs only.

I LOVE CRABS. But lazy to peel. 🙁 So never get to eat crabs. T_T


The fisherman arranging his squids so that they would look prettier.

Oklah, not exactly a favourite. Sting rays have the texture of rubber.

*Air liur meleleh more*

Not a fan of green apples, but such a pleasure to photograph!

We bought these though. Pulut udang. I thought it was otak-otak. Felt so disappointed. 🙁

So kaku lah they all. Supposed to do that running running thingie and look back at the camera and wave pose.

Damn old school right???

This is me buying my dinner. Yeah, makelove the diet. Mummy and Daddy say I cannot swear on my blog. Sorry.

KEROPOK LEKOR!!!! I know WHO loves it. hehhee. But you can’t have too many of it at a go, or else you’ll cause your palate to feel really raw..Owww.. And then if you leave the rest for later, it’s no good anymore because it’s best eaten when its crunchy and hot!!

finger food!

Oh god…………..*orgasmic*

One of the highlights of Malaysian cuisine.

Lie Yuen wonders about the usage of pink coloured onions.

I’m not entirely excited about something pink for once.

It’s supposed to go with this french toast thingie.. which is actually a square omelette.

Fried sausages.

Fried chcken!

pulut udang!

Abit like curry puff….but they have all kinds of fillings.

The obligatory bag of satays.

Inside the pulut udang..

The three fattening food to rule them all!!

It’s good to break away from the norm every now and then. I’ll DIE if I have to eat kuay teow thng, chicken rice, wantan mee or bakkutteh every night. Or Kangkung with soup.


In The Name Of Emo-Loving…..

…cannot cannot. I must stand up for one of the greatest pair of lovers around.

I don’t know about you guys lah, but this Smalls always emo about how much she loves Gavin, and misses Gavin and stuff.

Apparently, *eye open big big like preparing to tell BIG conspiracy like that. sorry too much of Da Vinci Code* Gavin also blogs!! At this group blog that he has with his friends, called ThinkTanks. Quite ingenious, the name.

However, his friends think that he has been emo-ing a little too much in his posts as of late. About what else but of a recurrent theme which is subtlely described as,Its a female monkey. Rather challenged vertically. Cackles alot. Commonly seen snuggling up to Gavin like there’s no tomorrow.”

Apparently there is a petition going on to go against the Emo Gavin at their group blog. They are having the petition to impose an Anti Social Behavioural Order on him. HAHAHA. GO AND VOTE TO GO AGAINST THEM, PEOPLE.

Jocelyn gets a free dinner from Gavin lah for promoting it on her blog.
Me ar? Um, Gavin doesn’t know me, but I think I should have Smalls’ gratitude. Hehehe.

I like bo liao things. *pbbbffsst*(raspberry)